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Experiences with beloved deceased

The deceased we love show us that they still exist in many ways. Electronics are easy for the deceased to manipulate, for example, lights and telephones. Many people are finding coins that have some significance in relation to their deceased loved ones. Maybe it is the economy but coin finding is becoming more common. Butterflies or birds that hover or follow may be a message for the deceased if they had a connection or affinity for that species. The deceased can enhance the blooms of a favorite flower or bush, and we may smell their perfume, pipe smoke or a baked good that reminds us of them when there is no reason that this olfactory cue would be present, for example, smelling apple pie in the car. And lastly we are with our beloved deceased in dream state and sometimes we remember these dreams. While not all dreams we have about the deceased are visits if there is an unforgettable quality to the dream, or if the dream changes the way we feel, we may well have been with them. I have a friend who’s mother draws hearts in the steam of her shower curtain, she used to hide a heart in her paintings. What are your stories, what are the experiences you’ve had that you might like validation for?

Posted by Gretchen on Thursday, June 19th, 2008 at 5:54 pm.

37 Responses to “Experiences with beloved deceased”

I find it very interesting that these small cues can set off such an overwhelming rememberance of a past loved one. We all have experienced deja vu, does that intertwine at all into how these cues stir up these enhanced senses or triggers? Very powerful stuff.

Left by Ben Adams on June 30th, 2008

Thanks Ben,
When the deceased contact us it is in real time, so although the experience may evoke a memory, the deceased are right there with us trying to communicate.
Gretchen

Left by admin on July 13th, 2008

Gretchen, 25 years ago, when I was 5 months pregnant with my firstborn child, my sweet father passed away from a massive heart attack. It was a hot day, the 12th of August, 1982. My husband actually took the call because I was in the shower after weeding my garden. When he told me that my dad was en route to the hospital, I cried and pleaded with my grandmother not to take him (as if she could..he was her life when she was alive). Two months after his passing, I dreamt that he was sitting on my neighbors steps visible from my kitchen window and even though it was a cold autumn day, there he was in his khaki pants and white T shirt..his sailing clothes. When I saw him, I ran outside and he told me that everything was going to be alright, and I shouldn’t be worried at all. I wanted him to stay, but he said he had to go. My daughter was born on nov. 4th and my dads 56th birthday would’ve been the 6th of nov. To this day, my daughter still says that she felt him before she was born and always thinks they passed each other somehow. She has always felt a strong connection with him. I do believe her..and I believe my dad came to me. I have also done meditations where people dressed in bright white robes with white hair and blue eyes have appeared to me. I was asking to see my grandparents and my father, and although they didn’t resemble them, I think thats who they were. The message they gave was not to judge everything by it’s cover. What do you think about all of this?

Left by Ann on August 5th, 2008

Gretchen, hello again. I just wanted to let you know that out of the blue my oldest brother John recently e-mailed me to ask me if I was interested in reading a good book. I really had no idea that he knew I was interested in your type of work, and yet, there was his e-mail offering to lend me your book. I’m so glad he did. I appreciate what you do.

Left by Ann on August 5th, 2008

Ann,
Thanks for your posts. Your dream sounds like it was real time communication with/from your father, especially as his clothing was so distinct to you. It is so easy for deceased loved ones to reach us in dream state but often we don’t remember. How wonderful for your daughter that she has your father – no doubt- as one of her guardian angels or guides. As much as we miss them it is also good to have loved ones watching over us. We do incarnate in groups in order to help each other accomplish our soul’s learning. You are all connected and remain connected.
The angelic presentations do not seem like communications from beloved ancestors. It is much more common for them to move/change/enhance something in physical that will have specific meaning to us in relationship to a memory of them. We also need to be careful not to open ourself up to just anything/anyone in meditation as there are so many earthbound disincarnates who prey on our energy and so trust your gut, if it feels like the tone or essence of a loved one comes, it may well be a visit, if it doesn’t feel right or makes you feel un-centered after- it is not a valid communication.
My very best wishes to you and your brother and I’m sad that you have so much of life here without your father here in physical with you.
Gretchen

Left by admin on August 6th, 2008

Gretchen, thank you so much for your response. I truly respect your input. Thank you for validating what I already knew..that I was lucky enough to get a visit from my dad. As far as the meditation goes, I always cover myself with Christ light before going in, but you’re right..these 3 beings didn’t feel evil or bad in any way, but they didn’t feel like ancestors at all. I was freaked after the fact, but not fearful. Thank you again. You are awesome. A

Left by Ann on August 6th, 2008

My 10 yr. old daughter just told me that she has been having visits from her great-grandmother in her dreams.
She said she lays beside her in the bed and tells her that she misses everybody and she is watching over them. She was visibly upset last night,she cried the entire time that she was telling us. she said it scares her. I told her that the next time she had a visit, to let g-mother know that she was scared. This morning she told me that g-mother told her last night that it was Ok, she was just protecting her. Is this normal? I thought she might be making it up, but she was so vivid in her details. What is your opinion.

Left by Teresa on October 3rd, 2008

Dear Teresa,
I’m glad you wrote as your mother’s instinct is correct- this is NOT GOOD. Any deceased that frightens a child is either not who they are representing themselves to be or don’t have the child’s best interest at heart. Even if this is her g-grandmother the deceased need to respect the living and who ever this is – she should be dis-invited and some protection in energy should be used each night for your daughter for a while. If you have spiritual beliefs certainly pray with your daughter before she goes to sleep. Ask that the white light of God’s love fill the room. Then ask for her own angels to shield her. After clearing the whole house or apartment with white light ask for a cone of silver energy to cover your living space. I use energy bombs to clear my space and imaginary walls of ice when I know where the direction of the harm is coming from. I call this spiritual hygiene. Let me know if this helps!
Best Wishes,
Gretchen

Left by admin on October 6th, 2008

Hello,
I never dreamed of my husband while he was alive. Then almost a year and a half after his death I started dreaming about him. The first dream scared me so that I sat bolt upright in bed and screamed “he is here”. I do not remember anything else about the dream but I felt a presence standing by my bed just before I awoke. Now when I dream of him it is usually about us doing or getting ready to do something together like travelling, making lists, packing, etc. I was actually afraid of my husband at times when he was alive so I guess that fear came through in that first dream.

Left by Jerre Miller on October 25th, 2009

Dear Jerre,
I work with many people in grief and dreaming is so much a part of processing the loss. In my experience, most dreams that people have are not encounters with the deceased, just this processing. For example, some people feel tremendous guilt about things not said or done before time ran out, so they will have dreams about trying to resolve this unfinished business.
It is possible to have a dream that is a visit, but they have a rare quality to them, you are right, you are just processing your loss, and maybe thinking that if things had been different between you two you might have made other plans. thanks,
Gretchen

Left by Gretchen on October 25th, 2009

Hi, my husband passed away 2 years ago. I have for several months now had a recurring dream. He usually doesn’t speak but the message always comes out the same & it is that he leaves me. In one dream he left me at the alter. In another one he told me to wait for him in this room, I was there for hours but he had left. Many different variations of the same dream but in the end he always leaves me. My husband & I had a great marriage. Is he telling me to move on?

Left by Beverly on November 29th, 2009

Dear Beverly,
My heart goes out to you for your loss and I also admire your courage to have lived through the last two years. Grief is different for everyone, but it is a hard process no matter how well we try to cope.
If you had these dreams right after your husband died I would have interpreted them differently. But now he may be ready to cross the earth portal- that transition that the deceased tell me feels more like death than physical death. The earth portal is where the densest of our energy bodies are left, we are more energized after this transition, yet the things of the earth affect us less after this transition. It moves us away from the close proximity to the earth. It is a big step. This is the light on the TV show the Ghost Whisperer. This is not to say that your husband has ever been a ghost, many deceased people chose to stay close to familiar people and places for prolonged periods of time. This is entirely his choice.
Would it make sense that he wants to give you some space at this time, encouraging you, going forward with the rest of your life and learning here in this manifestation? Your heart is the only person that knows this, but it does not mean that he is leaving you, as in energy we can always bridge the gap to each other no matter how “far” we are away in energy. So he will still be a guide to the person/people he loves here, he will still be aware of us when we think of him. But he may now wish to be moving on with his own learning and and advancement. It also does not mean that he would not be able to greet you when you die.
Meditate or pray and wish him freedom when you send him your love now, see if your dreams change.
My best wishes,
Gretchen

Left by Gretchen on November 30th, 2009

Hi Gretchen. I have been reading your blog, as well as your book, with great facination and so much of it resonates for me. My husband passed almost 11 weeks ago. Since then he has given me numerous messages and comunicated with me in many ways; electroniclaly, by writing, leaving signiifcant things for me to find and through music, and thoughts. I find these communications most comforting and also that when they happen they help me feel more in tune with this process, not so alone and help my healing, though this is all still so new and raw.
I was wondering if there is a point at which the deceased stop communicating with us, or when and if there are times- in their and our process- that they would more often commuincate with us or be more likely to do so. In your book you write of feelings becoming less strong after the deceased move on. Do they still want to commuincate with us down here then after that or as they go further into tehir after life experiences? Is there a reason for them to if they don’t feel as much as they did before or in the same way?Are they still interested in us and watching over us? In your experience how does that evolve?
I have heard of people having communications, dreams, and such many years after their loved onces have passed, but I am wondering as our loved onces reach different stages in the after life if that changes. And thank you so much in advance for your answer.

Left by Barbara on March 19th, 2010

Dear Barbara,
We have already been in touch, but I do want to answer your questions as best I can from my experience and study. Everyone is different, there are no rules. I could give you SO many examples of how other deceased people respond with living spouses, but that wouldn’t mean that any of these scenarios would be yours and your husband’s.
You may feel your husband constant and present for the rest of your life, you may feel him standing next to you, you may even channel him and let him look through your eyes at someone he loves, listen to music with your ears. He may give you space if you need it or ask him for space and he may hang so close that he is in your breath if you want him that close. He may sleep beside you each night and watch over the ones he loves each day. I think a lot has to do with our recognition of them and our desire to have them close to us.
In the newness of his experience I would guess that he is still close. His energy will be that of his best day ever when he was encased in this matter we call the physical body. This is not to say that he cannot see clearly the things in his life that he wishes he could have done differently, but the deceased are helped to an honest self evaluation by predeceased lived ones and spirit guides- the same guides as we are in life if we are open to them.
The deceased certainly have things they can do away from us, as many of the healing modalities they participate can absorb their attention for periods of time. Time is of no importance to them, and eventually they will move on to meaningful work, whether it is before you join him in spirit or not. I cannot say what he will do, but when they prepare to transit the earth portal or the tunnel as it is called often there can be that years after kind of manifestations of them- the out of the blue communications.
Also when the deceased leave the close proximity of the earth it does not mean that they are not still aware of what their loved ones are doing, and every time we think of them they hear us. After my Mom died I was mentally calling her name rather loudly for her, she asked me to tone it down, my calls were disturbing to her. They can hear all of our conversational thoughts about them…even the ones when we are angry that they left us here to cope.
So there is never a time when a deceased loved one would stop communicating with us if we asked for them, unless they are in pre-birth focus, or in a deeply involving healing modality. The healing phases are temporary, and the pre birth focus would not be likely to happen in your lifetime.
I am pleased that you are aware of his messages and acknowledge them. I pray that they are helping you in your grief.
What you can be absolutely certain of is your husbands feelings for the loved ones he left here are more clear, more profound and uninhibited emotionally. Savor the knowledge of his love, savor the feeling of it, the certainty of it, and his pleasure at your realization of his communications with you. Your choices will determine the relationship you have going forward- more than he will, in spirit we are more free to love than when wrapped up in life’s concerns. He will follow your lead, consider your needs and your wishes for ongoing communication to the best of his ability.
I’m sorry for your loss and the delay in responding to this,
Gretchen

Left by Gretchen on March 23rd, 2010

Gretchen,
Thank you so much for such a thorough and also compassionate answer to my questions. Your answer has encouraged me to go on feeling and letting in what I have been experiencing and what I have been believing is really there and happening around me in ways that are unexpected but that keep on unfolding in an amazing way. It also gives me the comfort of knowing that this interactive experience with spirit can keep on adding a whole new loving dimension to my life- that things are not over- just different than before. Thank you again. Much loving energy being sent your way.

Left by Barbara on March 25th, 2010

Hi Gretchen:
About 15 years ago my husband was murdered. I was shattered as we only were married for 2 years. After 3 years I had a dream and he told me to stop crying and that he was happy, having a good time.
3 months ago, I lost my companion of 4 years tragically. His death left a void in me and a lot of unanswered questions as our relationship was rocky to say the least in the the year preceding his death and upon his death many disturbing things came to ligth about his life in the past year. So far I had 3 dreams of him and he doesn’t look happy. In 2 of the dreams he is holding on to me and the recurrent conversation of those dreams are basically the same: he needs to talk to me, he needs to clarify some things.
I am lost to say the least. For the past 3 months I’ve been reading a lot about angels, conversation with the dead, Karma and reincarnation trying to make some sense out of everything that is happening but I still feel that I am not there yet.
Do you think that it was him talking to me in my dreams? Should I probe further to know what exactly he is trying to tell me? How would I go about knowing what he is trying to tell me?

Left by Betty on March 29th, 2010

Dear Betty,
I’m sorry for my delayed response, I have been traveling, and sad that people you loved have transitioned out of physical
Most deceased function well, as you may know from reading my book. However we are still as responsible for our self, responsible for our experience as we were in life.
Your husband’s communication to you that he is happy is a typical and frequent consolation that we are sometimes blessed with.
Your companion that you more recently lost may have been on a much different learning path than you are- we are all on different learning paths here. If your companion now, through the help of his guides, teachers and helpers, has regrets that he is trying to communicate to or through you that would also make sense. He may be wishing to clarify something, not necessarily with you, but about some action that he now has accumulated a karmic debt about. He may know that you are receptive to his communications, while the person that he harmed in his physical life is not receptive to him. The deceased try to reach through the living that are aware of them. So what he needs to talk about with you may or may not have to do with you.
I guess my question to you is how responsible do you feel toward your deceased companion? Ask to know, from your own guides or inner wisdom if this is something you wish or need to pursue for him or not. Be assured that he will work this out eventually, either between lives or in the next incarnation. You cannot spare him his karmic debt, but on the other hand this may be something you wish to do with a medium. I would try to sort out what might compel you to follow up on the companion with a medium might be unfinished grief work you may not have accomplished for your murdered husband versus spiritual responsibility you may feel for your companion. Actually you cannot take spiritual responsibility for anyone else, either living or dead, everyone has to be self responsible, but we do attempt to aid each other toward their own learning goal.
For me it really comes down to how you feel about connecting with the energy of your companion, try to feel within your heart if you want to connect with him or not.
please keep in touch and best wishes,
Gretchen

Left by Gretchen on April 9th, 2010

Hi,
It’s been several yrs since the loss of my husband.He had been ill for many, many years and for the past couple of years I’ve been having reoccurring dreams.He comes to me as if he were only gone temporarily (staying at his moms) and never deceased. He died in my arms and knowing all he had gone through I knew I was always there for him and loved, cared for him unconditionally. I was at peace. However, during his illness, his family distanced themselved from us and didn’t take part in our lives. My husband once told me he would never want me to remarry. Recently, I’ve become involved with someone and I’m trying to figure out what these reoccuring dreams mean. I wake up crying and feeling guilty that I’m moving on. By the way, these dreams began before I was ever involved with my boyfriend. What are your thoughts?

Left by Patty on April 19th, 2010

Dear P,
I commend you on your journey in this lifetime, loving and being a caregiver and hanging in with a very hard and very sad process, wow, I am awed. I know that place of no regrets that is a place of peace within our grief.
Anyway I feel your dreams are your own thoughts. Many dreams we have are our own processing of the trauma of his death.
A wonderful thing happens with most of us when we transition into the world of spirit, we have the opportunity to heal completely from life’s problems and misconceptions. No doubt your husband is healed and knows that love is the only thing that matters, unconditional love that offers freedom to those we love. If you have found love again in this life I am happy for you and I have never met a healed deceased person that did not want the best for their loved one here on earth. I can’t speak for him, but I know the perspective that the deceased come to and in all likelihood he would want only the best for you here.
best wishes,
Gretchen

Left by Gretchen on April 20th, 2010

Hi,
It has been 7 weeks since my husband of 13 yrs died. I haven’t had many dreams, but when I do it’s always the same…He doesn’t know that he is dead. In my dream I tell him that he has died. I miss him so much. I want him to be here with us. Why would I tell him that he is gone and can’t stay? I write to him every night. I wonder if he knows what is going on in our lives. We have a 10 yr old daughter. She has only cried three times for her dad. Does he know that? Does it bother him?
cris

Left by cris on September 21st, 2010

Hi Cris,
I am so sorry that the extreme pain of grief is now a part of your life. It is the hardest journey we take in this physical existence. My heart goes out to you and your husband’s family.
I can’t say whether your dream is your own anxiety or a message, but here is something you can do. If you know of a loved one of your husband’s that pre-deceased him, think of that person and ask them to come and greet your husband and inform him that he is now out of physical and that he needs to move toward the healing light. Then when you think about him ask him to look around for that person, or his own guides and personal angels. If he sees them he can test them with the white light of God’s love- and then let them advise him of what to do now.
Your daughter may be containing her feelings in order to not upset you even more. Or she may be in shock or denial. I would suggest working with a grief counselor with her, as she needs to feel this sadness so it won’t inhibit her from shutting down all emotions in her life which would lessen her quality of life. Also be kind to yourself- you may have what I call grief brain, you are tired, forgetful, and a bit hostile as no one can really walk in your shoes and know how you feel. Grieving may be the most private and individual of all the human processes. It changes us so profoundly we don’t even recognize ourselves anymore-
keep in touch and write to me through my site if you want to.
my warmest regards,
Gretchen

Left by Gretchen on September 26th, 2010

It’s been 2 1/2 years since my husband of 39 years died. I have not had any dreams of him. I pray that I can see him in my dreams but nothing happens.
This is the hardest thing I have been through in my life. I don’t ever want to marry again or even fall in love with another man. Is it normal to grieve for my husband until I die.

Left by Paula on January 2nd, 2011

Dear Paula,
I’m sorry for the delayed response, I don’t know why your post finally appeared.
It is normal to grieve the transition of your husband, and no one should ever tell you when it is time to stop, only you will know when your journey in grief is complete. This journey is painful and it can also take us to some dark places within. Grief is such an inward journey. It can also lead us to self love when we forgive ourselves for our sadness or any hurt we caused our self or our loved one. You might also want to be aware if you become so depressed in your journey that you want to take your own life or live in such a state of despair. If the grief is overwhelming you can first try some herbal remedies and even look to anti-depressants through your physician.
Sometimes the emotion we surround our self with in grief can block communications from the deceased. Your grief may be even preventing a connection in energy. Some deceased cannot breach our emotion with their energy.
One thing you can be sure of is your husband is concerned for how you are doing here. There is so much help in the world of spirit for the deceased, it is unlikely that he is feeling anything like the grief you are. The deceased cannot sustain negative emotion without it impacting them so greatly that they cannot function. Healing and help is available to everyone there. If there was anyone who loved him that pre-deceased your husband, that person already started your husband on a healing path. What you really want to know- that he will be there for you when you transition all depends on the love you have for each other. It sounds like he will be there for you. But now, while you are in this world you need to be here for yourself, patient, loving and striving for as healthy a life as you can have, even without his physical presence. We really have no choice, we have to do the best we can no matter what is going on around us.
My heart goes out to you,
Gretchen

Left by Gretchen on January 31st, 2011

Hello Gretchen: I came across your website about the afterlife and experiences with beloved deceased. I would like to share our website http://www.oursonbilly.com with you. There you can read our story and view a few pages of the type of signs that we have been and continue to receive from Billy and others from the otherside. Oh, happy Valentine’s day and God Bless.

Have a great day
Guy

Left by Guy Dusseault on February 14th, 2011

Dear Guy,
What a wonderful thing that you are in a vibrant relationship with your son in the world of spirit. Billy is leading you to a deeper understanding of the whole plan, the larger flow which is that we are evolving and learning no matter where we are. He is gifting you with knowledge and love and I especially admire you staying in the light considering your heartbreaking separation from Billy while you complete your physical life here. We can go so dark in grief, or we can choose to honor our deceased by enduring pain that we don’t think we will survive, and doing the best we can to complete our mission here, everyone’s grief is a different journey, and yours has been one of love. Thanks so much for sharing,
Gretchen

Left by Gretchen on February 14th, 2011

Hi Gretchen, I experienced something a little while ago I have never, ever encountered in my life. I was on my laptop, at the kitchn table, while through the corner of my eye noticed movement in the laundry room. It was the top of my trashcan, swaying back and forth, as though someone had just discarded something. No one else was in the house, and I had NOT thrown anything out since early morning! I was, however, talking to my sis in law previously, and my brother, her hubby, recently passed away last July. We were also talking about my Dad, who passed 10 yrs. ago and was a big jokester, yet had a heart of gold. Could this be a sign or am I going nuts?

Left by Laura on March 11th, 2011

Dear Laura,
Everyone has some awareness of and ability to interact with the world of spirit. It is out birthright but for most of us this communication is not wanted nor sought for various personal reasons. I’m not in the camp that encourages people to seek interaction for its own sake, but through prayer and light send love to our beloved deceased, if they send a sign it is to be considered a gift, acknowledged and treasured.
Is there some reason that now would be the time for either your brother or father to contact you with a sign, is this near an anniversary, a birthday etc.
The other question I have is how did this make you feel? Did you laugh or did the hairs on your neck stand up. The emotional reaction says a lot. If you laughed I would guess they were trying to get your attention, if you got the willies, burn some candles, play spiritual music loudly and ask for your space to be cleared of unwanted influences by your own guides and angels.
There is so much we are not aware of so when our loved ones send a gift in energy there may be a reason.
The other option is I am nuts too, ha ha, but I constantly see things I could not know in my meditations with clients. I want that kind of validation in my work. And even if my spirituality is just a coping mechanism as my brother tells me, that is OK too.
If it felt good it IS good. But pay attention to other small things for a while, something else may happen.
thanks so much for your question,
Gretchen

Left by Gretchen on March 13th, 2011

Hi Gretchen, my husband passed away almost 6 months ago, he is the love of my life and best friend, we have two sons. We are so very heartbroken. When it first happen ,I was in disbelief and in shock, I would basically lay around in a zone, but I did have signs from him, I even felt him touch my back and say my name, but now after the shock is wearing off, I have fell in a deeper depression and I havent felt him around me as much, does he still know how much we love and miss him and is he watching over us, my health is not the greatest and I want him to be there to meet me when it is my time. I would like to think that him and my brother are together in spirit ,they were close when they were alive, my brother passed away almost seven years ago and I love them both so very much. I have always been a believer in the afterlife and I will be purchasing your book, thanks for your time.

Left by Cora on March 24th, 2011

Dear Cora, I’m so sorry that this profound grief is part of your life now, it is a journey that can take us to some really dark places, but we can also through grief, strive for the most positive way to honor our loved one in the world of spirit by continuing to learn and cope in our world. When you were in a daze, or zone, as you said… your mind was open to communication from your husband. I have no doubt he was stroking your back and trying to get through to you. It is an irony that when, emotionally, we need that consolation only they can give the most, we can be blocking the communication. So as you feel worse emotionally, that darker energy blocks his communication which is more subtle energy. I know you can’t help how you feel, and I am not saying this for any other reason than to explain that his love and focus didn’t leave, but it is harder now for you to feel him near you. It is hard to keep breathing when the emotional pain is so , and there seems to be no relief. My heart goes out to you as you learn to live with the pain and loss, to cope, and to simply put one foot in front of the other.

Left by Gretchen on March 26th, 2011

Thank you so much for your response Gretchen, I would just like to share some of the other experiences I had after my husband passed, on about four different occasions I would be alone just sitting thinking of my husband looking at his picture and I would sing to him, it would be one of our songs so to speak, as I was doing this , this one particular toy would start making sounds on its own , for it to make the sounds you have got to push down on a lever that is on it, but it played on its own, it has never done it any other time and for it to do it all four times on different days, I felt this was my husband making it do that to show me that he does hear me. Also, my husband loved eagles,and I never really remember seeing them beforehand, but since his passing I have seen them quite a bit. That was just a few more of my experiences I wanted to share with everyone that I had not mentioned in my earlier post, and again thank you for your reassuring words, knowing that my husband is close by and watching over me and our kids will help me stay strong.

Left by Cora on March 26th, 2011

Dear Cora,
What a beautiful testimony of love, of his abiding love for you. The toy playing by itself shows me also that your husband is a fairly advanced soul/mind. It is not that easy to affect matter for the deceased, they have to have a certain amount of concentration and will power. So that speaks volumes to me of his stature and ability to love in the world of spirit. Your letter also speaks volumes to me about you, that you are singing to him, what a light filled thing to do in spite of the pain in your own heart. And that you know he is with you will keep you sane- (although some people might say the opposite if they don’t believe we continue). Stay open to him, yet keep in the light of love in whatever tradition speaks to you, whether it is prayer, chant, music, etc. I can connect you to people I know who have amazing continuing communications, one client in NYC I’m thinking of…
My first thought that came with the eagle is courage, also the ability to rise above and see the larger view. The other day two flew across our hay field, up high, but in the evening sun they were lit up. I’m so glad you accept his gifts, nothing makes the deceased happier than when their love for us is felt and acknowledged. Do you have my book? I’d be happy to send you one for free. Write to me at gretchen@howspiritworks.com.

Left by Gretchen on April 9th, 2011

A few months after my husband died, the day after my birthday…..I woke suddenly feeling very sad that he was not there for my birthday. Also, my feet were exceptionally cold, under one blanket and I couldn’t get them warm.half awake, half asleep….i contemplated getting up to get another blanket, but was too sleepy. As I started to doze off, suddenly my feet became instantly and ver comfortably warm…like enveloped ina warm pail of water…Then, I felt a flannel like, warm fabric cover my feet. different than the silky ccomforter that was on my feet. I went to sleep and my feet were toasty all night. When I woke up, I remembered the experienced..looked at the foot of my bed, and my husband’s fleece bathrobe, which usually hung on the bedpost…it was laid out pristinely over my feet, with the silky comforter ON TOP of it, again laid out pristinely. I know that it was my husband who came to cover my feet; perhaps the cold feet were a result of the spiritual visit so he warmed my feet and then covered them with his bathrobe. I know this was a miracle….and I know that bathrobe DID NOT accidently fall like that on my feet. I have had many other equally miraculous spiritual visitations from my husband, who loved me dearly and begged me to “get ready to come with him” as he was dying of cancer.

Left by Shirley on May 2nd, 2011

Dear Shirley,
I don’t doubt that your husband covered your feet with his robe. What a beautiful gesture of love. I know several stories of our loved ones from the world of spirit moving things. Sometimes the things they move were not there when people looked, then they appear in the place where people had already looked over and over.
It takes a lot of focused energy to move something in physical for the deceased. This tells me your husband has a lot of concentration and the ability to gather energy from his vantage point. He must be incredibly present in your life, even in his spirit form.
Your story is so touching, I imagine he must have been a loving thoughtful person in life to be such a dear from the world of spirit. Thank you so much for sharing this with me.
My heart goes out to you that you are continuing your journey in life without him, but we are all on different learning paths so even in your pain try to see some of the beauty of life in order to honor your husband. I’m sure you no longer have any fear of death, knowing he will be there the moment you are ready to step out of your physical body.
best wishes,
Gretchen

Left by Gretchen on May 4th, 2011

I lost my beloved husband to heart attack more than six months ago. I am told that I am “psychically open” as I felt heaviness right after he died. He came in my dream on the 13th day of passing where he sat at the edge of my bed. He was in shadow as it was 5 AM in the winter and told me that he was gone and I should lead my life. I woke up and was upset that he didn’t tell me he loved me. Then a month later I had pranic healing session and he came through to me. He said he loved me and lot of things that just made me happy. Prior to that I used to get electric interference in my home. I went through a cleansing process to help him transition. I have NEVER dreamed about him but three people close to me said that he came in their dreams and was smiling and laughing…so looked happy. I was told that our love was so selfless, pure and deep that he and I will continue to remain connected and keep communicating with each other. What do you think?

Left by Sanny on September 6th, 2011

Dear Sanny,
I am so sorry that you are in the journey that is so difficult here. Feel your husband’s love, it will become more pure as he is healing. He will become your best guide and ally then greet you when you transition.
Someone is a recent reading said an interesting thing about dreaming. The deceased said to my living client that it was too soon for them to dream together as the chemicals of grief were too present in the brain (which is not the same as your mind). It was these chemicals caused by grief that would turn any dream into more of a nightmare. In other words the chemicals of stress would not allow the mind dream to translate well into the conscious dream. This is not to say they are not together in some aspect of mind, just not in the remember-able type of dream that many are waiting for. I have never remembered a dream with my mother, but I have touched her energy with my mind and she has touched my ind with her energy. This is not the same thing as dreaming. The people close to you do not have the stress chemicals and so he can convey the message to you easily through them. It is an irony that when we most want this kind of connection our physicality can prevent it.
So think of your mind energy touching and merging with his, and accept the gifts he sends you, Don’t worry about validation, that will come and you will be absolutely sure within yourself that he is communicating with you.
my best wishes,
Gretchen

Left by Gretchen on September 9th, 2011

Dear Gretchen,
I’m only seventeen years old my dad had recentley passed on the 6th of december this year and it’s been a week and a half already. I’ve only ever dreamed about my dad twice apart of me whishes i could find out if he has gone into the light, My mum and brother also wish the the same if i could only ever find out if he’s passed into the light and that he’s happy would make me happy.. I still miss him to this day i keep writing on his facebook page. I feel saddened that im about to be eigteen on the 27th of dec and he’s not going to be there.. how do i know if he’s crossed over.

Left by Jaylee Neal on December 16th, 2011

Dear Jaylee,
I am so sorry that you are missing your Dad, and learning to grieve at such a young age. The important thing for you is to think the happiest memories of him that you can, especially when you are feeling bad within yourself. Ask your mind to remember the happy times, replacing the darker thought with a thought light filled about him. Let yourself grieve but also take time to remember your Dad whole, healthy and happy. Think of him in this way in the world of spirit.
As to dreams, many times we dream and it is a product of our own mind. But some of the dreams have a quality about them that is different. Some deceased tell me they don’t come to dreams until their death is processed somewhat by the living loved one, in other words, be patient, I have no doubt he will try and reach you. Some deceased are healed right away and make themselves known immediately. There is no judgement to either condition, people in the world of spirit are as different as we are here. Actually your Dad has not gone anywhere in time and space, he is still here and he is still in the present. But without his body he is invisible to us. He can communicate in energy ways, subtle ways and it is better to think EVERYTHING is a message from him then that nothing is, sometimes they will be messages. When you are in a peaceful space in your mind talk to him, tell him you miss him, but also count all the things you can think of about what he did with you – the good things, thank him for these things, they never tire of hearing how they have contributed to their loved one’s life, and how they are still loved.
Especially on your birthday take the time to be grateful that you knew him and that he can now help you from a vantage point that sees more than we do in physical. Most parents stay in a guiding relationship with loved ones. Don’t beat yourself up that you can’t hear his voice in your mind yet (maybe you can already) but this will come in time. You’ll be driving along not thinking about much at all and you may hear his voice in your head. If he tried to make you laugh in life he will still be trying to do that, for example.
Please don’t worry about how he is doing There is so much help over there- especially from loved ones that are already in spirit just waiting and happy to help. If your Dad was close to his grandmother or any other family member that is in the world of spirit you can be sure he has been contacted and shown the ropes of how to be there.
I suspect your heart really hurts now, but it will hurt less as time goes on, the pain will shift to something you accept and carry with you always, that missing of him and that you are living your life without the certain feedback of his physical presence, but HE IS THERE, he would not leave the family that loves him. His attention and mind will always be with you.
When we are healed in the world of spirit the love and compassion we have for each other is profound. He will help you and he will try to help with your suffering. The best thing is to keep loving him, know he still exists and is becoming healed.
He will see how you honor him with the way you choose to live your life. He can see into your heart. On your birthday make sure you blow out a candle and make a wish for his health and happiness where he is now, include him in the celebration. We the living are under the impression that we have lost the deceased but the deceased are never under the impression that they have lost us.
Keep loving him and thinking the best thoughts you can about him, if he died of cancer remember him when he was well, for example. I am happy to write to you, and I am honored that you reached out to me. I have lost someone more dear than my own life to me so I have had to learn these things first hand, otherwise I would not be able to tell you about them.
Be kind to yourself and the others who are missing him so very much now. Make a place with his photo and light candles for him, get an ornament for your tree if that is what you celebrate and add one every year to show him he is still a part of your Christmas. Someone told me about a message box they had and they would write small thoughts to the deceased loved one and believe that they knew what the notes said. Make rituals that honor his part in your life, and try to speak of your Dad in the present, know he is there, he sees all of you and feels your love for him.

Left by Gretchen on December 21st, 2011

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